And since it works for them and costs me nothing to try, I gave in and quietly gave it a go.
Nothing had changed -- I couldn’t just search for dudes who would be more likely to fit into my body range.
While I appreciate the thoughtfulness that went into this list of online dating do’s and don’ts for plus-sized women, something about it left a bad taste in my mouth.
Admittedly, that could be in large part because I woke up this morning and walked over to my coffee pot and was like “Oh hey cool! ICE COFFEE IT IS” but as I am most inured to the effects of eating and drinking things in various states of rot, I must be turn back to the article as the source for my gastrointestinal distress.
DO YOU THINK BEAUTY IS THE EXCLUSIVE PROVENANCE OF THE THIN? Play By The Numbers So you’ve begun to flirt with a potential date over Al Gore’s greatest invention - the interwebs. But before things go any further, be sure to communicate to your would-be paramour that you have slept with thousands of people whether it is true or not - that he knows other people have found you to be desirable is key to your happiness. To be sure that he really, really means it, respond to his request for a date as follows: “Thanks so much, but I know you are just asking me out to be nice:(“ Then sit back, and let the games begin! It’s one thing to be a fatty, but another thing entirely to be a fatty who eats food for enjoyment and sustenance. Sad truths: in some less dramatic forms - each item is something I’ve totally be guilty of doing in one borked way or another.
It’s crazy to me how willing we can be to sabotage our own happiness. Okay gang, I showed you mine - show me yours: what’s the biggest mistake you’ve made when dating online?
That all squared away, let’s bring on the funny, with a list of 5 Things A Plus-Sized Lady Should Absolutely Never Do When Online Dating:1.
Pick A Punny User Name Worried about how your potential date might handle the news that you are every bit as luscious as depicted in your profile pics? For example, here are some names I have used to cut down on confusion: Cake Eater, Beccaomnomnom, Becca Got Back83.2.
why are dating sites making it so hard for fat people to meet each other?
(I know not all big guys are into big girls, but it seemed like a more logical place to start.)Yes, I understand you have a calculator somewhere that says I’d have a lot in common mentally and ethically with this attractive guy who claims he can’t live without biking a century every weekend, but I’m telling you its not gonna fly.
When someone says it’s important to date someone who’s in shape, they usually mean it. Somewhere out there is my geeky dim sum-loving prince who thinks a night spent watching disaster flicks is 7 percent of heaven WHY ARE YOU BLOCKING ME FROM DESTINY?
Be Aggressively Confident On a first date with a guy you’ve met online and he’s being sexy-sweet, saying something like, “You’re so beautiful”?
Be sure to bark back at him “OF COURSE I AM BEAUTIFUL - WHAT? He’s found your profile witty, your interests complementary to his own, and your looks stoke his engine. You’re on your second date and you’ve gone from a glass of wine to a full-blown dinner! To be extra sure that you keep his interest don’t eat in front of him!
It's not like it's difficult emotionally: just ditch these ridiculous euphemisms for fat and allow people to be matter of fact about it so I don’t have to feel like an interloper in skinny-town.