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What if he is racist against other Asian countries? I talked about some of the cultural disagreements I’ve had in this post about the differences between couples fighting in America and in Japan. I speak Japanese fairly-fluently (can understand everything, but have trouble formulating all of my thoughts in a timely and concise manner).I’ve been with my husband for almost three years; we are finding things we need to compromise on. But there is a understanding no matter how much we study each other’s languages, we will never be an integral part of each other’s families.During race discussions at my school, most of the white women I talk to say things like “I’ve never seen racism, so I don’t think it still exists” or “racism isn’t real – they are just imagining it!” Or men that say “sexism isn’t a problem, women over exaggerate everything!If you’re ‘lucky’ no one will come up to you in the street and ask “why are you dating him? The closer the friend, the more you tend to dislike their choice of a partner.Expect the roles to be reversed on you, except this time, your friends and family have a whole new way to judge your partner – race, religion, culture, and cultural beliefs. In the course of your AMWF relationship, you will run across old friends and new acquaintances who want to ‘save you from ignoring this obvious problem.’ Most of them mean well. But people’s words hurt a lot more than they realize. While it would be foolish to ignore the impact Japanese culture will have on my relationship, our foreign cultures are not the determining factor on whether we can have a successful marriage.Love is not enough to keep a relationship going, it is definitely not enough to conquer all problems, but it certainly helps. [For more, check out: Things I love about Japan: Couple Wear] Intercultural dating is a lot of things. Two years later, and I never know what to expect on dates. But I really fell in love with the culture once I started dating Ryosuke. He was the one who helped me understand the types of sexism in Japan (for more, check out this post) But living with him, his family, and his friends, I have been given the enormously unique opportunity of doing participant observation of the Japanese culture.

The only comparable feeling is probably when I won tickets to see a live taping of Stephen Colbert, discovered chocolate soy milk (milk allergy), or, like, my future kid gets married.

[For more, check out: AMWF the Unfinished Wikipedia Article] Thankfully, the internet is a wonderful place that connects people from all walks of life. AMWF stands for Asian Male, White Female, meaning couples composed of an Asian Man and a White Woman.

It represents a small minority of interracial couples, most American, Australian, and European women dating Korean, Japanese, and Chinese men.

If you do not respect and appreciate your partners culture (to the extent you are willing to forsake elements of your own culture for their benefit), intercultural and interracial relationships are nearly impossible.

I started to wonder if there were any other couples “out there” like me.

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The other two books I know of AMWF relationships are: More than anything, it is a collection of stories from eight foreign women who are married (or were married) to Japanese men.

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Comments:

  1. 1
    Steve

    I like people with good manners and who are polite, not just to me, but all of my fans as well!

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    Steve

    Besides using the example (and don’t) above as a starting point, here are several other tips for when you’re filling out your profile information: If you aren’t as intelligent as Marie Curie or as funny as Amy Schumer, then don’t try to come off like you are. Take some time to think about what you like about yourself and make that stand out in your profile.

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    Steve

    I don't need a man I am happy with the one I've got!

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    Steve

    Creating online dating profiles helps consumers carefully consider potential matches.

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